How to know if you’re a baller:

1. You don’t have a savings account, just a HUGE checking account
2. You make use of private air travel
3. You have outrageously expensive clothes, all of which were given to you for free
4. You’re dating a smoking hot babe
5. You’ve never heard of a mini-baller

How to know if you’re a mini-baller:

1. You choose to live paycheck to paycheck even though you have a six figure salary. You have a 1% money market savings account with a few thousand dollars, meanwhile you overdraft your checking account on a regular basis.
2. You buy your flights on expedia but you don’t like to, you use miles to upgrade to economy plus, you buy vodka tonics on the plane
3. You have outrageously expensive clothes, all of which you paid for and most of which you buy because you saw a mini-baller the previous night who was wearing that outfit and “getting it done”
4. You say “get it done” all the time. You’re not sure what this means, but you know its important, and when you say it . . . you mean it.
5. You aren’t dating a smoking hot babe but you want to, so on saturday nights you call your mediocre looking girl friends and ask them to help you get into Marquee hoping you can meet a hot babe there. You look at the liquor list and almost order Absolut, then you remember you’re here to get it done and so you pony up for the Goose. You always hit on the waitress and you always tip her over and above her 20% grat, then usually you go home with one of your mediocre friends. You like it, but you tell other mini-ballers that you regret it.
6. You refer to yourself as a mini-baller, you tell other dudes that you’re a mini-baller and suggest to them they start calling themself a mini-baller too.